Why didn’t I write this paper last Tuesday night when the class ended, when the information was all still fresh in my mind? is all I can think about when I stare at the stack of papers on my desk, lined with empty verbiage that I can’t seem to regurgitate on a Sunday afternoon.
Other people are at the lake or spooning frozen yogurt into their mouths in the summer heat. My roomie and her boyfriend are out to lunch somewhere, probably sitting on a patio or staring out into the sunshine from an air conditioned dining room. Meanwhile her kitten is curled up in my stacking baskets, occasionally yawning and peering up at me to make sure I’m still here.
People are at the park or taking naps or riding on roller coasters. And I’m staring blankly at my computer screen wondering why it’s so hard to just whip out this final paper. It only has to be four pages. I’ve written 10 page papers in a single night. I wrote a 100 page thesis. I can do this.
I’m so over being a full-time student.
When will I feel like a grown up? When will I become disciplined and mature? When will I have money to spend on trips and a house and a car and new clothes?
never, someday, soon.
I should really go get some coffee.Continue reading